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Struggling in your esteem? 7 ways to be  more confident
in the woman God has called you to be
EEW Magazine / June 2017 Issue
Posted June 5, 2017
Photo Credit: Getty/The Image Bank Tim Robberts
Anyone can pretend to be confident, but don't you want the real thing? Healthy self-worth is not
about external fixes. It’s all about the inside, from whence strength, values and perception emanate.

If you're struggling with confidence in the woman God called you to be and you want to be free,
EEW Magazine recommends that you do these 7 things:

    1. Get your journal out and write.

    There are likely at least a few unfavorable things you were told about yourself in your youth.  
    They have now grown into weeds of self-doubt, fear, insecurity, low self-esteem and
    depression. Get a pen and a journal, and write out the hurtful lies you heard about yourself

    Once you get them down, cross them out and replace the negativity with something positive.
    Then pray over those things and ask God to help you overcome the assault on your

    2. Meditate on self-esteem-building scriptures.

    “You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you” (Song of Solomon 4:7, ESV).

    That’s one of my favorite self-esteem-building scriptures. What are yours?  If you don’t have
    any in your arsenal, it’s time to change that. Find verses that confirm how loved, powerful,
    valued and awesome you are. Don’t just read the passages, but study, meditate on them and
    confess them.

    This might seem cheesy to some, but I recommend posting affirming scriptures around the
    house. For example, placing a sticky note on the mirror you use when getting dressed, with
    your favorite affirming scripture written on it, is a great idea!

    3. Clear out your circle as needed.

    Get rid of non-essential, unfruitful relationships that do not affirm who you are in God. If there
    are hangers-on in your life who don’t speak positively about you, your dreams and
    capabilities, and always nitpick, and make you feel worse about you, it is time to say goodbye.

    While you will never be able to disassociate from every negative person (Sometimes God
    uses them to toughen your skin and help you grow!), when it is in your realm of control and
    you feel so led, don’t hesitate to cut ties. Some people serve no purpose at all but to

    4. Change your words.

    This is huge! Don’t curse your own life with what you say. Eliminate stupid, failure, ugly, fat,
    incompetent (and other not-so-great words) from your list of self-descriptive adjectives. Say
    what God says about you, even if you don’t feel it.

    Tell yourself: I am worthy. I am loved. I am anointed. I am God’s chosen. The more you
    repeat these things in faith, the more your mindset will shift and empower you to bear fruit in
    your life.

    5. Deal with your history.

    This piggybacks on confidence-building tip #1. Were you unpopular and marginalized in
    grade school? Did you get bullied a lot? Were you most picked on and isolated? Were you
    abused or traumatized in some way? You have to go back and address the past before you
    can appropriately dress for your future. Confront any hurts head-on.

    Discover where the lies that were planted in you originated, so you can get free of them.
    Uncovering the past root helps you understand the present fruit you are producing. Before
    you can build confidence, make sure the foundation is secure, so you are not trying to build
    on top of a toxic waste dump!

    6. Stop the comparison game.

    Some of the most confident people in the world will tell you they don’t waste time comparing
    themselves to others. The key to seeing your own worth is realizing God made you one of a
    kind. Your beauty is individual. Your path isn’t like anyone else’s. Your journey is special.
    And your progress will go at a pace best-suited to you, your maturity level, faith capacity and
    ability to handle things.

    Don’t look at your neighbor to see what mold you should fit into, because God doesn’t repeat
    himself. The individual DNA and fingerprints of every living person on earth is proof of this.
    He crafted your unique design for His unique purposes.

    7. Maximize your strengths.

    The gifts God has placed inside you are there so that you may show forth His glory in the
    earth. So be intentional about playing up your strengths and maximizing them.

    There are some things you can do that no one else can. When you put your special touch
    and flavor on those things, you get awesome results. So learn to maximize your strengths in
    every scenario and you will feel more confident about who you are and what you do.

Let’s face it, we all have weaknesses and areas we don’t excel in, which doesn’t mean we are less
than anyone else. We’re just different. Embrace your differences, stay in your lane and God will use
you to do great things.

Being more confident in who God has called you to be is really achievable if you face all doubts and
fears, seek God's word for guidance, focus on the right things and remain prayerful. A woman who
does these things consistently is not only confident, but powerful and effective in the Kingdom of

This article is part of EEW Magazine's June 2017 online issue.
Copyright © 2017-2020 Empowering Everyday Women Ministries, Inc. All rights reserved.
Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.
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In an engaging interview
with EEW President Dianna
Hobbs, Bishop Vashti
McKenzie, EEW Magazine’s
2017 “Best Book of the
Year” Award-winning author
The Big Deal of Taking
Small Steps to Move Closer
to God,
opens up about the
trials and triumphs of
ministry, overcoming the
death of a child, and
dispelling the “balance”

Click here for the full story.